Aroma
by In memory of wicked fire
Summary: How soon is too soon to move on? How long is too long to wait? How does one recover from a broken heart? For Takuya, it was more than a makeover for a music video shoot. Takuya/Teruki, Teruki/OC, Takuya/?, Kanon/Bou mention , Kanon/Takuya one-sided
1. I don't know when I stopped loving you

**Title: Aroma**

**Length: 1/3**

**Rating: PG (subject to change)**

**Warnings: Language, yaoi, angst  
**  
**Pairings: Takuya/Teruki, Teruki/OC, Takuya/???**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything but this storyline and my love of the lyrics**

**Summary: How soon is too soon to move on? How long is too long to wait? How does one recover from a broken heart? For Takuya, it was more than a makeover for a music video shoot.**

* * *

**Chapter 1- The Un-moving Memories Suffocate my Heart  
**

I don't think I've gotten a decent night's sleep for a month. That's what I realize as I'm turning over in bed to see the clock flashing 4:38AM at me in the wake of the very early morning. His words are still ringing in my head like an overly popularized song that every radio jockey plays on their stations ten times a day. They won't go away. It's annoying as hell. I sigh and sit up, rubbing my eyes open as I decide that this will be as much sleep as I'm going to get, which is pretty good considering I went to bed at midnight. I reach over the nightstand to my phone and check it: No calls, no texts messages, not that I really expected there to be, but I hoped there would be a "Goodnight, sweet dreams" text waiting for me.

We've talked, we've texted, but as reassuring as his words are- "I still care about you", "You're always going to be my best friend", "It's not because we didn't go further"- there are still his other words that take a knife and stab those words until they're dead and bleeding on the ground- "I've had doubts for about a month", "I thought it was obvious that I had a problem with this", and of course, "I don't know when I stopped loving you".

It stings, and the pain gets to my eyes. I try rubbing the pain away, but more tears fall instead. I guess this whole thing is my fault, really, despite him saying it's not. I, in a moment of terrifying and very strong doubt of my sexuality, wrote that note to him, saying how I can't picture myself with him, how I don't think I'm bi or gay or whatever you want to call it. But that was a year ago, and we talked about it, and he said it didn't bother him. I'd like to think that that note- that stupid fucking note- wrote itself, but I have to take the blame for this, why we ended up so broken. I just wish he would have told me sooner instead of holding it in for as long as he did. I want to hate him, because I never considered guys until him, but now that he's gone, I can't imagine myself going back to "how I was before". And I can't find myself hating him, as much as I try.

I can, however, try my damnedest to hate that new boyfriend of his. "It just happened," he said. "I wasn't planning on moving on so fast," he said. I guess I didn't mean that much to him, since he moved on two weeks after breaking up with me. And just last week, he brought him to rehearsals to introduce us all to him, and I tried to fake a "nice to meet you" personality, but ended up running out of the studio and crying. He keeps breaking my heart, there seems to be no end to it.

I hate songs on the radio. Songs that never applied to me suddenly do. Ones of heartbreak, of not being able to move on, of cheating. I feel that still. I feel like he cheated on me, even though he says we're not together anymore. It's too soon, it's too fucking soon. But he's not available, and I'm left in the dust, alone.

* * *

Going to work everyday has become a struggle greater than any I've ever had to face, and everyone else could see that. Miku said to go home for a few days and get some rest. Kanon said that they were just going to fine-tune everything in the studio, so rehearsals weren't necessary if I needed a break. Yuuki said to try to move on, "It has been a month, after all." I know he was just trying to be helpful, and that's what I keep telling myself, but he's still in every thought, every corner of my mind, his sweet and sometimes dirty texts are still taking up space in my inbox (I'm too scared to delete them now that I know he'll never send those to me again), his lips and hands, his body, I can feel the hot marks they left on my skin, and the moment I place my own touch to my lips or my neck, the hot turns to cold again.

I ended up taking three days off, using those days to get some sleep with the help of a sleep-aide pill or two, compose a song, based off of this chain of events of course, and seek out a therapist to help me get some insight, as well as helping me come to terms with my sexuality, and maybe telling my family. I just need someone to talk to, and he's not there anymore, and the others wouldn't understand.

Walking into the studio certainly is different from when I was there last. It seems so foreign to me, but I woke up on a bad note, from a dream... more like nightmare now, of a weird montage of our past sexual and romantic escapades, that resulted in more tears taking my sleep away again. I'm sure my eyes look somewhat bloodshot and puffy, but when I see everyone, no one seems to notice, or don't want to bring it up, as I'm sure they already know. And they don't ask the ever-so annoying question of "Are you okay?", since that seems obvious, too. I look over to him, and our eyes meet. He still looks so beautiful, which makes me jealous that I can't bathe in that beauty as I would have a month prior. He gives this wayward attempt at a smile, then turns away. It is only after that that I feel my heart beating faster at the fact that he acknowledged me.

I try to focus my attention back on what the others- band and staff- are talking about: A new music video, followed by a new single. I remember the composition I have folded and tucked away in my back pocket, but I'm too shy to bring it out, since I've only composed one other song before... Thinking of that song now, it would fit very well to my mood lately. I listen more: "We wanted to know if you all would be interested in taking a new direction?" When asked further, our manager replies, "Well, maybe stepping away from the bright colors for this video? You know, to show your versatility to the Cafekko." We all look at each other, liking the idea, except for me, who is looking down at the floor. All of a sudden, I feel my body acting on its own accord, pulling the paper from its hiding place and holding it out. "I think I have a song that would work for this," I say, confident and timid at the same time. Miku grabs it out of my hand and he and Kanon, who is hovering over his shoulder, read it. Kanon looks up with a small smile. "Wow, Takuya, your mini-vacation really did you good," he says, making me blush, embarrassed. This prompts Yuuki to read over Miku's other shoulder, and soon, both of them are praising me, too, with big, goofy grins that I missed on my time away. There weren't any grins or smiles on my days off, so it was refreshing but strange at the same time. And when the manager reads it over, he nods his head approvingly. "I think we could work with this very nicely." And for the first time in a while, I forget that he's in the room, lingering at the same spot. I'm too enthralled by the positive attention.

* * *

There aren't many modifications made to my composition, to my surprise, and it sounds like what I had imagined it to be. Because of this, the recording of the song is estimated to take no more than a week, and Miku says he's gotten so inspired, relating it to his own past relationship, ironically, that he has the lyrics done in a matter of three days. It's times like these where I am glad to have music and my guitar in my life. I can tell it my feelings, no matter how bad or obscure they are, and it won't judge me or leave me, but instead, stay and make the negative feelings something so awing. We start recording two days later, each one of us sticking around to listen to the recordings of each part. When it's his turn, he gives a quick glance over to me, then turns back to setting up his drums in the recording booth. I watch him. It will have been a month and a week tomorrow that he dumped me, and almost three weeks since he started going out with... him. I guess you could say that things have gotten better. It has been awkward, but we managed to get into a decent conversation, but I can't look at him, because I know if I do, I won't be able to control myself. Still, I don't feel like we are friends. I still feel like we are broken, and it is a rotten feeling, knowing that he probably doesn't feel that way, or if he does, it will go away the minute he gets away from me and straight to him.

When he gets behind the drum set, he starts off strong, as always, but there is a new power to his drumming. Hard, like he is angry. The manager stops him and tells him to tone it down. He mutters an apology that I see from the glass that separated his recording room from the studio where I stand. Again, he looks at me through this glass, and then back down before starting up again, with less intensity. It suddenly occurs to me that he never shines his 120-watt smile my way anymore.

* * *

Different looks... different looks... what could that possibly mean? I've dyed and cut, or let my hair grow out, to a few different styles, and I've worn some out-there things, though certainly not as out-there as Miku or Kanon. What could I do? Our manager wanted us to step back from color- except for Yuuki, since it seems as though the Cafekko would think it to be a cold day in hell when Yuuki isn't wearing anything silly or colorful, or both. I'm walking around a shopping area in town with Yuuki, since he's literally got clothes in his closet picked out to wear in the music video, my nose in a punk-rock fashion magazine. I find myself wondering what he will wear; He always wears simple things, but usually his personality or his seventeen ear piercings will make him exude much more than clothes ever could...

"Yoo-hoo! Takuya? You listening?" I hear on my right, along with a couple of jabs by a finger at my arm.

I stop walking and shake my head free of the bittersweet thoughts, looking up at Yuuki. "Huh? Oh, I'm sorry... What were you saying?"

He exaggerated a sigh as he continued talking again, and I processed that the murmuring I heard in my ear was him trying to talk to me before. "I was saying that I think I have everything all set for the video... except for the shoes... Oh! What do you think about bowling shoes?"

I stare at him quixotically. "Bowling shoes? I'd say... you were ready to go bowling?"

"Really? Hmm, I don't want to do that then..." He hummed, placing a finger on his chin in deep thought. His face suddenly brightened up with another idea. "How about clown shoes?"

Again, I stare at him. "...Did you say 'clown shoes'?"

"Yeah, they'd be perfect!" Frighteningly enough, I can tell he's not kidding. "My uncle used to tour with a circus, I wonder if he still has his pair..." As we start walking again, I start to understand what traits he got from what family members. I attempt a small laugh. "Go for it if you want to. You can pretty much pull off anything." I know this to be true as well. If he was like his uncle, and decided to take a side job as a clown, I'm positive he'd still have legions of fans filling up the big top.

"Thanks!" He replies cheerfully. I smile back, not having to fake it. I'm glad I had Yuuki help me come shopping. Even if our senses of fashion totally differ from one another, his personality suits me perfectly. "So, have you found a look yet? We're getting close to some of the stores in that magazine, I think."

"I'm not sure... All of this stuff seems so... heavy." I'm not sure how else to describe it. Yuuki takes the book from my grasp and flips through a few pages as we walk. "Well, I'm sure you don't have to go too-too far out of your comfort zone. You just need to be... darker, but comfortable, of course."

"Of course," I repeat. "Yuuki, do you know how to walk around in clown shoes?" The question comes up on the topic of 'comfort'.

He's silent for a moment before answering, "It can't be that hard. But if it is, the most I do is stand behind my 'board. I could just take them off and walk around set holding them in my hands!" He laughs at his own idea. I laugh at the mental image of Yuuki waddling around in clown shoes like a penguin. Things grow silent when Yuuki suddenly asks, "Takuya, I'm worried about you."

I immediately know what he is talking about, but dare to ask anyway. "What do you mean?"

He sighs. "Well, it's just, it's been over a month now. Don't you think it's time to... move on?"

"No." I answer too quickly. But the thought of me without him, it's terrifying. "It's been a month, but we were dating for over a year and a half, Yuuki. I'm not over it yet, I can't be, even if he is..."

"Well, that's what I'm saying," he says. "I don't mean that you have to get sucked into another long-term thing, but it'd be good to explore your options a bit, you know?"

He has a point, I know, but it still irritates me that he was saying this. I ran a hand through my hair. "I guess... I don't know, just not now."

Yuuki nods, understanding. It's then, as I'm looking up at Yuuki, that my eyes travel to the back cover of a magazine that he is still holding and I abruptly take it from him. Yuuki sees my curiosity and remarks. "Oh yeah, I've seen that look around a couple of other fashion mags, it's really catching on for some reason." It's a perm-like hairdo, straight in the front, but with wavy volume on the sides and the back. I find myself... liking it, a lot. It's not extremely drastic and bizarre, but it's certainly something different. "You think I could pull something like this off?"

"Maybe... If you're hair was a little shorter... definitely needs to be a different color too..." He analyzes my hair as if he was a stylist, which is somewhat amusing to me. "You think?" I ask, taking a strand of my orange hair between my fingers and looking at it from the corner of my eye, then shifting my gaze back to the picture of the male model on the back cover.

"One way to find out." I don't know what Yuuki is talking about for a second until I see him stopping in front of a hair salon. I keep thinking about my options: Doing it or not doing it. But I remember someone telling me once that the best decisions made life are spontaneous... or maybe it was from a TV show, I can't remember. But I feel myself grinning and looking over to Yuuki. He smiles back and we push open the doors to the salon. If they want a different look, I'll show them a different look.

I'll make him see just what he gave up.

* * *

**A/N:** ...What has it been, like, four, five months? o-0

And here I am, starting another story XDDDDD

I need to get back into my creative swing, that's what this story is for. I know I have two stories hanging off of nowhere, and I promise I'll get to them once my college stuff is done. But for now, there is a point I want to make about this story, if you guys don't mind ^^;

Overall, the happenings of this story are entirely true, based off of what has happened to me in the past two months. It's one of the reasons that I've been away for so long, along with school, but what I went through/am going through is a far more prominent reason. Call it therapeutic.

I also listened to AROMA a lot during this time, and the lyrics are so true for me, I can relate to them extremely well. The lyrics are in the chapter titles as well, and...well, I wish I was more creative with the title =\ So, it's based off of creating a backstory to how AROMA came to be, my second song-inspired AND true-life inspired story. Go figure XD

...Plus, there's a severe lack of Antic Cafe fanfics x_x

Anywho, this story will be short, and with vacation coming up, and the need I feel to complete this story for my own sake, I will be updating soon!!!!!

Thank you all for your patience! ^_^ Oh, I'm too lazy to make a real OC for Teruki, so just use your imaginations!! And the Takuya/??? pairing will be revealed soon!!


	2. And overall, he looks hot

**Title: Aroma**

**Length: 2/3**

**Rating: PG (subject to change)**

**Warnings: Language, yaoi, angst**

**Pairings: Takuya/Teruki, Teruki/ OC (mention), Takuya/???, Kanon/??? (mention), Kanon/Takuya (one-sided)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything but this storyline and my love of the lyrics**

**Summary: How soon is too soon to move on? How long is too long to wait? How does one recover from a broken heart? For Takuya, it was more than a makeover for a music video shoot.**

* * *

**Chapter 2- I'm Not Afraid of Being Hurt, Because I Don't Have Anything To Lose**

"Uuuuuuuuuuughhhh! Where are they????"

Miku has a tendency to overeggagerate, this being no exception, but he does have a point with his outburst. Everyone- the hair and make-up artists, the photographer, the staff, and the band- got here on time for the album cover shoot, and a magazine or two just in case... everyone, except for Yuuki and Takuya.

Teruki, sitting to the right of me, sighs. "Who would've thought it'd be the newbies that are late? Usually it's you, Non-chan." He adds a laugh to the affectionate nickname. I just roll my eyes- well, eye, since one eye is covered by a patch- and mutter "Yeah, yeah, yeah..."

Miku plops down in the foldable chair next to me, seeming annoyed, but that's just his childish impatience coming out. We're all watching the staff set up for the photos, and also looking behind us to the clock and the door where our two missing bandmates should be coming through. I've been worried for Takuya for a while. He's looked absolutely drained and down ever since he and Teruki broke up, and Teruki's uncanny bounce-back ability has only made it that much harder for Takuya. His age, and the fact that Teruki was his first (from what I know, anyway) are playing against him as well. Naturally, there was an unspoken rule that bandmates don't date each other, for fear of this sort of thing happening, but I guess since Teruki's the oldest, we all just sort of assumed that he'd be responsible in his way of handling things with Takuya- asking him out, and when he told me and Miku that he wanted to end things with Takuya the day of. Of course, me and Miku tried to tell him not to, or at least to be gentle with it... but even then, things have been rocky ever since, and the band's starting to suffer because of it.

Miku's playing with one of his many buttons, and Teruki's running his hand through his much shorter hair. We all had our outfits picked for the shoot, so what we came in wearing today is no surprise to any of us- When Yuuki sent a pic to us, Miku commented that Yuuki looked like a space clown... whatever that is, Teruki said that I seem to be having a thing for eyepatches lately, Yuuki told Teruki he looked like a totally different person with his shorter hair, and I laughed at the fact that this would be Miku's third shoot with a vest on. But Yuuki told us that Takuya didn't have anything picked out yet, again, something that only fueled my worry for him even more.

Without thinking, I make a comment about the one thing that has more or less been barred from being talked about. "I wonder if Takuya's feeling well enough to come today..."

This gets everybody to look at me, including Teruki's unusually cold stare.

"I'm sure Takuya's with Yuuki and they're running late," Miku says semi-confident, trying to avoid any fighting. But still, I can't help but say, "Maybe, but don't you think he-"

"He'll be here." Teruki cuts me off in an equally icy tone to match the look on his face. I see Miku tense up, looking scared, and knowing how he is to anyone he knows fighting, I decide not to press it anymore, even if it is bothering me. "You're right, they'll be here soon."

I don't know why Teruki's so sensitive to all of this. _He's_ the one who broke up with Takuya, right? And _he's _the one who's moved on... So why? I always find myself wondering that, especially when his new boyfriend drops by; Takuya tries not to show it, but he shuts down completely. It's really sad to see, I find myself wanting to comfort him, let him know that while it doesn't seem like it, things will get better... But I'm not that bold, and I don't like to cause a scene, always something I regret later when he's the first one to leave the studio, like the place just caught on fire.

Come to think of it...It's more than the break-up situation I've been thinking about... I've been thinking about-

"Hey! So sorry we're late, guys!"

My thoughts are interrupted by Yuuki, yelling as he rushes through the doorway, catching the attention of everybody in the room... especially when he falls down. Miku and Teruki run over to help him up, I'm still half spaced-out, so the most my body will allow me to do is stand up. It must be my AM-hours of MonHan...

"Yuuki, are you okay?" Teruki helps Yuuki up and sounds concerned, but has a clear laugh in his voice, a complete 180 from how he was just moments ago.

"Yuukikki! I told you you shouldn't have worn those big-ass clown shoes!" With Miku, it was very obvious that, even if Yuuki was hurt- he wasn't, visibly anyway- Miku found the fall to be hysterical because of the cause: What I'm sure will become infamous of dear Yuukikki, clown shoes that were a good 10 sizes too big for him. I laughed where I was, thankful that Yuuki unknowingly broke the tension between the three of us.

He stood up, looking embarrassed, but riding out the attention for as long as he could. "Yeah, I know, but you have to admit they're kinda cool! And I needed something to make me stand out." Yuuki says all of this with a smile that always seems etched onto his face, and for some reason, I find myself envious that I can't smile like that, too.

"Are you kidding? You stand out more than any of us right now as it is!" Miku playfully punches Yuuki's arm, and then adding. "Well, most of us... Yuuki, have you seen Takuya?" I look out to see if Teruki tenses at that 6-letter name; he doesn't.

"Oh! Yeah, we came here together. He should be in... here... by now... what are you two staring at?" Yuuki slows his answer down when he notices both Miku and Teruki looking past him, at something making a silhouette at the open doorway. He looks behind him, and naturally, I look to where everybody else is looking.

And there he is.

I swear there's a collective gasp the moment we identify the shadowy figure as Takuya, minus Yuuki for some reason. He's decked out in all black, like Teruki, but there's an edge to him unlike any that we've ever seen. It's dark, and very Visual Kei, something that Takuya was always hesitant dressing as. But even the way he came into the room is different. It's more confident and sure. He looks brave.

And overall, he looks _hot._

...Wait, did I really think that? And why's my mouth open? Quickly, I close my mouth, thankful that everyone is still understandably staring at Takuya, who just starts to look a little nervous at all the attention. I make my way over to the gathering by the door just as Miku starts exclaiming, "Takuya! Wow, you look... wow!" He's speechless for the first time in... well, a long while, as is everybody. Miku's got a big grin on his face from seeing the younger's new look, and as I get closer to Teruki, he's visibly impressed, almost looks like he's checking Takuya out, but keeps turning his head away, trying not to stare. Yuuki smiles again and wraps an arm around Takuya's shoulders. "Yeah, I helped him out."

"With the look, or the hair?" Miku asks. "No offense, Takuya, but I don't know if I can believe that the hair was entirely your idea..."

"But it looks good, though," I add, not wanting Takuya to think we don't like it. But Takuya looks at me with his newly eyelined eyes, and for some... really strange reason, I feel my face getting hot, so I look right back over to Miku, who nods at my comment. "Yeah, it does! But it's so... different! I wouldn't expect you to do something so wild, Takuya."

"Actually, it _was_ my idea," Takuya admits both proudly and nervously. "I was with Yuuki last night when I got it, and the outfit. He just gave a second opinion, right Yuuki?" I couldn't help but think it was cute that Takuya, despite this clear change in attitude, still felt more comfortable with someone backing him up. Yuuki, now taking his arm back from Takuya, nods. "Mm-hmm. He said he was looking for something different, and well, who knows different better than me?" Yuuki modeled his shiny jacket, cowboy hat, clown shoes, and every other crazy thing he's wearing to everyone, and we all can't help but laugh. It's Yuuki-contagiousness, I swear.

"Oh, Takuya, you've been so off the radar lately, this is your first time seeing everybody! Soooooo, what do you think?" Miku, like Yuuki, eagerly displays everybody in their outfits, I feel slightly embarrassed for being presented like a prize in a showcase. But Takuya giggles and gives the most earnest smile I've seen on him since before the break-up. "I really like them all, I'm glad I'm not the only one who decided to do black. But, Kanon..."

He's walking over to me, and once he gets just about a foot of distance between us, he moves the hair out of my face that's covering up my eyepatch. "You're wearing it again?"

"I... I mean, it's not the same one..." I reply, referring to the patch from the Cherry Saku Yuuki shoot. And... if I'm not mistaken, I just sounded more nervous than Takuya. ...Somewhere in the world, the Twilight Zone theme is playing...

And... now I'm wondering why I'm wearing the patch when my hair is covering my eye just fine?

"Oh, I know," He replies, "But I like it better when you show your eyes, though I do like the contact." He finishes with a smile, but I see something in his eyes, this glint of... something... but it's really... enticing.

Wait, what the fuck is wrong with me? Usually I'm never so anxious or awkward, and up until now, it's been easy for me to act normal around Takuya. So then why the hell am I acting like this???

"Okay, we're all here, let's get on with the shoot, shall we?" Teruki suddenly chimes in, flashing his famous, 100-watt smile before turning to the direction of the set-up. Everyone follows, Takuya last, since I'm sure he doesn't want to be close to Teruki. But I'm left standing here, utterly confused. I swear that, out of the corner of my uncovered eye, I noticed that he was... no, he couldn't have been... was he staring me and Takuya down???

I fucking hate this.

* * *

Okay, so now I'm annoyed at the fact that I'm acting like such an idiot, but I try to suck it up as the photographer is explaining the set-up of the shoot. It's the usual- one group shot and then 5 individual shots. And the main objective for everybody is to make sure that Takuya and Teruki aren't near each other, unless it's by choice.

The order usually goes by who gets done with hair and make-up the fastest... Of course, Yuuki's first. I'm up next and I see from my uncovered eye that Takuya has come out to watch my shoot. ...And, yet again, there's that same look in his eye, like he's checking me out. What the hell??? I must be imagining things. Maybe it's the hat, maybe it's knocking my thinking waves off balance... or something... Gah, this is ridiculous. Okay, I need to focus on the shoot, which is easy since all I have to do is stare with one red and black eye, I could keep my other eye closed and no one would know the difference. Yeah, easy, I'll be fine... Dammit, stop looking at him!

It's only been a few minutes, but I feel like it's been an hour, and the photographer says that he wants me to look at his shots. Trying not to look at Takuya- failing again- I take off my eye patch to see the chosen best pictures, and after giving my approval for the top choices, I flip the patch back down and make my way back to where all of the chairs are... Somebody up there loves to see me squirm, because the only chair left available is the one closest to Takuya. This is so messed up... I mean, I know I have a crush on him, I have for a while, but now it's turning to an all-out mash. GOD, WHY AM I ACTING LIKE THIS NOW????? Uggggggghhhhh.....

This day sucks, officially. The only good thing about this day is seeing Takuya's new look, and that certainly is acting as a double-edged sword. But if there's one thing that I'm good at, it's looking indifferent. I take a deep breath, and take a seat next to Takuya, who greets me with a small smile. "Hi, Kanon."

I give a small smile back, looking down at my boots. "You seem more quiet than usual today. Are you alright?" I hear his voice chime next to me.

I look up at him, getting lost in this adorable- I guess, that's the only word I can think of- look of his. Everything, from the newly permed hair, to the brooding eye make-up is a really unexpected turn-on. I shake my head of daydreams, since I'm daydreaming before answering him, and that makes him laugh inadvertently. "Yeah, just tired, I guess."

Takuya is still giggling a bit, nodding to my answer. "I know what you mean, I was up almost all night."

I look at him, curious. "Really? Why?"

Before he gets the chance to answer, Teruki comes out fresh from hair and make-up and goes up to the greenscreen, ready to shoot. Something in Takuya immediately shifts, and he turns silent, and back into the shy Takuya that we've all come to know. Nothing needs to be said at this point for me to understand why he was up so late. "How-" I clear my throat of nervousness, worried I'm pushing his buttons too much by asking this, "How have you been doing?"

He hums, sounding like he's thinking about a right answer. "I don't know, better, I guess. But I just wish that I could skip this part and act normal again."

"It'll pass," I say, confident. "Things like this happen, and will take a while for the hurt to go away."

Takuya scoffs at what I just said, but I don't think he purposely did it from the look of apology in his eyes. "You've been through this before, I take it? Or are you just quoting some "and how does that make you feel?" TV show?"

I scoff right back at him from that last question. "No, definitely not from a TV show... He left, so it's something similar to your situation, I guess. But believe me when I say that this will pass, it's not permanent."

He gives me this very skeptic look, turning his attention to Teruki, who's now posing. "How long did it take for you?" He asks, never taking his eyes off of Teruki.

I'm surprising myself with how open I'm being, even though I haven't given out any names or specifics. Maybe it's because, underneath this badass new look of his, he really is like me- shy, reserved, and more of a listener than a talker, and yet, we seem to talk more when we're together, a liveliness that's only been brought of Takuya by one other person: Teruki. I sigh before replying, "It's still passing. I'm not entirely over it yet, but there are other people on earth for companionship, and to help you move forward, you know?"

Takuya looks over at me. It looks like he literally had to rip his gaze from Teruki. "You've found someone already?" He sounds amazed.

"Well, I mean... It hasn't been as recent as you and Teruki. My break-up was... almost two years ago, I think."

"Two years???" Takuya's eyes widen, stunned. I let a smile slip out because I can't help but think the dramatic facial expression is cute. "And you still haven't gotten over it?"

I sit up, ready to defend myself. "I'm not saying I'm still hurting like I was two years ago, and I'm definitely not saying that you'll be hurting for that long, either, it's only been over a month with you. My thing was... It was a break-up that we didn't _want_ to do, but we _had_ to, it's kind of complicated... but what I'm trying to say is, it doesn't hurt to put yourself out there. I've dated a couple of other people since then, when I thought I was ready, and none of them have been serious relationships like my last one, but I am moving on. You'll be able to, too." I look him in the eye, seriously. And for the first time that day, I don't get distracted by Takuya's beauty.

"Do you still love him?"

My eyes- I mean, eye, widens slightly at how blunt Takuya's question is. Again, I take a deep breath in. "Well, yeah, I do. But I can't picture myself ever getting back together with him, not when so much time has passed. And the love's just of what we had in the past. I think that's where I still find myself missing him, thinking of the past. ...Plus... I do like someone else now."

He seems to understand, though there is a part of him that's still unsure of what I'm saying to him, I can tell. And that's why I don't confess my feelings to him. I wasn't planning on it anyway, but it seemed like good timing to do so. Yet, despite everything that Teruki's put him through, it's easy to tell that Takuya still has feelings for him. And I don't really know what's going on in Takuya's head. Is he the kind to sulk and be depressed, or is he the one to hook up with people to fill the void? I don't want to be a rebound, and that's why I don't say anything else.

"It just sucks, you know?" He sounds extremely sad, but won't let himself cry. "Seeing him with his new..." My heart is torn, because not only is Takuya not over Teruki, but he can't even get himself to say the word "boyfriend" if he's not talking about himself. "And, I put myself out there like... this," he indicates his clothing.

Oh, _now _I get it. "You weren't trying to be different for the shoot, you were trying for Teruki." I say it more as a fact than a question, and Takuya doesn't argue it, shaking his head. "I don't know what I was expecting to happen, me dressing and acting like this. I don't think it was to try to get him back. I miss him a lot, and I still have this fantasy that we'll get back together, but I don't think that will happen, 'cause things just aren't the same anymore. But... I guess I just wanted to show him that he won't get to me, and that I can be confident and act..."

"Sexy?" I guess... out loud, making him look at me, and me cover my mouth, absolutely mortified. But he doesn't give a weird, or even a disgusted look like I was expecting. "Yeah, sexy... It's to show him that he can't take any of that away from me. It's true that he built me up to who I am today, but he can't take it away as easily as he helped make it." His smile turned into a sad frown. "But he doesn't care, he has... _him_." He slouches over and rests his head in his hands, defeated.

I lean over and rest a hand on his back. "I shouldn't talk like this about a friend, but who cares what he thinks? You're right, he has his new... well, you know. So just focus on yourself. Don't worry about anyone else." I let out a genuine smile, remembering this advice from the very person who put me in a similar position.

Takuya looks up at me, and sees the strength in my answer, which seems to reassure him that much more. "I-" He pulls back his question for a different one. "If you don't mind me asking..."

"...Yeah?"

"..Who's this other person that you like?"

I pause, then open my mouth to boldly answer, but a different voice comes out instead.

"Takuya, we're ready for you!' Takuya and I turn to the set-up where the photographer is calling for him. Teruki is off to the side, talking with Yuuki.

Takuya sighs again, and sits up, looking at me. "Go on," I say, encouraging, "They're waiting on you."

"Yeah," Takuya motions to get up, but I see that he and Teruki lock gazes, and I swear neither of them breathe for a moment. He settles back down in his chair, turning his gaze, now very intense to me, and puts a hand on my thigh.

What the hell is going on here?

"Thank you for everything, Kanon." He whispers low. The next thing I know, before I have a chance to say anything back, he cups my face in his other hand, and kisses me on the cheek.

...And then he gets up and leaves! And I'm sitting here, my brain feeling short-circuited, my face probably bright red, and the places where his hand and lips were burning and imprinting on my skin like a sunburn.

And again, my damn mouth is hanging open! I'm sure I'm sitting like this for a good minute, minute and a half, and that's when I see it: Teruki is giving me this intense, angry look unlike anything I've ever seen. He doesn't blink, never softens his stare, and most important, he looks _pissed off_. Suddenly, he storms off back to the make-up room, leaving Yuuki equally as stunned as me, runs off after him, and I'm left alone with the posing bad boy who's stolen my heart.

* * *

**A/N:** Update! Kiseki!!!! XD

Yes, I'm back, after some laziness, trials, and tribulations. (And I'm supposed to be writing a paper, so you guys better be appreciative XP)

Anyway, I took a new approach and wrote all of this right on the LJ post page, so I don't have such a horrid problem with the posting/ LJ cut again -_-" But yeah, here's my update, and hopefully you can ignore much of the rambling to get to the point: my pairings list has also been updated! ...And there's still more parings to add XD

No one, save for Yuuki and Miku, seem to know who they want to end up with, what they want to happen, etc... and this is where this far exceeds the truth from what I'm basing this off of. And hopefully, you all have figured this out, but if not...

Chapter 1:** Takuya's POV  
**Chapter 2: **Kanon's POV**  
Chapter 3: **Third person POV**Everything will come into perspective soon, and maybe I'll finally be able to finish a story x_x Who knows?

Thank you all for your patience ^_^ Final chapter will be up soon!


	3. Is Takuya really that spiteful?

**Title: Aroma**

**Length: 3.1/3**

**Rating: PG-13**

**Warnings: Language, yaoi, angst  
**  
**Pairings: Takuya/Teruki, Teruki/OC, Takuya/???, Kanon/Bou (mention), Kanon/Takuya (one-sided)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything but this storyline and my love of the lyrics**

**Summary: How soon is too soon to move on? How long is too long to wait? How does one recover from a broken heart? For Takuya, it was more than a makeover for a photoshoot.**

**

* * *

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Chapter 3 (1)- On Sleepless Nights, I Would Wait For Your Mail the Whole Time

I think I was asleep... I don't know, I can't remember. It's been 3 hours and I've just been lying on my bed... Well, the clock says it's been three hours, but it doesn't feel like it. It feels like 15 minutes. And that same stupid conversation keeps playing in my head...

* * *

_What the hell? What the hell? What the hell? What the hell? My mind is so frantic, I feel my brain heating up from how fast my thoughts are coming... I think my head's going to explode... Or maybe that's my heart. Yeah, maybe it's my heart. That's racing pretty quickly, too. But it was just a kiss, on the cheek no less. So why am I freaking out over this so much? Probably because guys don't usually thank other guys like that... Well, _I_ would, and come to think of it, Takuya probably would too. ...What do I mean "probably"? He just did! Man, what the hell????_

_Let's just say that I'm more than ready for the shoot to be over, especially by the time Takuya's done with his solo shoot. It was... enticing, to say the least, but this is the _wrong_ place to be enticed by anything, let alone "Teruki's ex," not that he should care, but from the death stare he gave me, he clearly does. When Takuya's done, he goes into the bathroom. Five minutes pass before I figure out that something is wrong, just as Miku is getting his turn in front of the camera. But as I'm walking over to the bathroom door, Yuuki pops up out of nowhere and cuts off my path. From under his sunglasses, I can tell he looks anxious._

_"Kanon! What was that whole thing with you and Takuya?"_

_I look at him, scrutinizing. "You were there, right? You know what happened."_

_He huffs. "Yes, I know what happened, but that's not what I meant! I mean, _why_ did he do that? What did you say to him?"_

_I hold my scrutinizing look. Yuuki's never been one to butt into other people's personal business before... "I didn't say... I was just comforting him, he's still upset, you know. But, I mean, I don't think I said anything that would make him do that. And he's been acting weird all day anyway!"_

_Yuuki sighs again, but this time, he sounds stressed more than annoyed. "Kanon... I don't think you understand. Teruki... Teruki's pissed, and I mean really pissed."_

_I nod. I figure that much already. "Did you talk to him?"_

_"More like he talked to me, well, ranted, actually. He thinks Takuya did it to make him jealous, because Ichiro came walking through the door, and a second later, Takuya kissed you."_

_"Ichiro? You mean Teruki's boyfriend?" Well, this is news to me._

_"Yeah. You didn't know that?"_

_Of course not, I was too stupefied to know anything other than 'Takuya kissed me'. "No... You really think that'd be the reason why Takuya did that?" I feel hurt. I know that Takuya is still hung up on Teruki, so the kiss confused me, but to know that he_ used_ me... Is Takuya really that spiteful?_

_"I don't know, but it makes sense. Teruki's so mad he had to send Ichiro away, he didn't want him to see him with the mood he's in. But that's just about as long as his fake calm lasted. Then he... blew up. Pheeew!" Yuuki makes a sound effect of Teruki's 'blow-up', and hand motions to match. I look beyond Yuuki to the bathroom door. "Is... that why Takuya's in there?"_

_"No, I've been with Teruki the whole time. I just left now because I saw that Takuya wasn't around, so I could tell you all this. ...Are you okay, Kanon?"_

_Am I okay? I'm not, but I thought I was hiding my not-okay-ness. Guess not. I feel like a fool, and maybe it's Teruki's jealous logic getting to me, but maybe Yuuki's right. What else could it be? Why else would Takuya do this? I nod slowly to Yuuki. "Yeah, I'll live." I walk back to my chair set up by the photoshoot, walking away from the bathroom, wondering why I was heading over there in the first place. _

_At first I was wondering why Takuya kissed me. Now I'm still wondering that, but my heart's not racing anymore. Now, it just hurts._

* * *

"Fuck..." I can't stand lying around like this, no matter how long I've been doing it. I feel suffocated in here, but I'm not in the mood to get out of the house. So, I just go out to the kitchen... strangest thing though, I feel like I'm lifting three times my body weight as I push myself off the bed. Maybe it's that cliche saying of 'the weight of the world,' but I wouldn't argue that that weight sounds just about right right now.

I just stand in the middle of the kitchen for a few seconds, not knowing what to do with myself. I'm not hungry, and I doubt I could eat anything anyway. So I sit down at the table, propping my arms up to support my heavy head. I know I'm supposed to do something right now... what was that again?

* * *

_"Okay! Very good job you guys! Thank you!" The staff and band members alike are shouting back 'thank yous' as everyone starts to depart. I look over and see Takuya practically run out the door, and Teruki and Yuuki exit from the back door. I take the top hat of my AROMA costume off and run a hand through my hair, looking over and seeing Miku being the only bandmate left, as he's taking off his jacket. I feel dazed, my body's not acting on its own, and apparently, I don't want to go home just yet. So instead, I walk over to Miku. "Hey."_

_"Hey," he replies back, not looking up as he unties his shoes. I sit down on the ground next to him and start to do the same. "So... I guess it's a good thing that the photographer didn't ask for a group shot, huh?" I say, trying to strike up a conversation in this awkwardness._

_"That's how it was set up from the start." I look up at Miku, surprised. "_You_ set that up?" Miku nods, finally making eye contact with me. "I did it so no one would fight. But it still didn't work..." I notice a crack in his voice. "Miku..." But before I get to ask what's wrong, he abruptly stands up._

_"I can't take this, Kanon! I don't want this happening again! Everything's falling apart and there's nothing I can do about it." Tears have welled up in Miku's eyes, threatening to fall at any second. "We made it clear, didn't we? I thought we did. Band members shouldn't date each other after what happened with you and-"_

_"You know that had nothing to do with him leaving!" I yell defensive, glaring. Amazing how this topic was just brought up a couple of hours ago, when I'm sure I haven't said anything about it for months now. "We broke it off _because_ he was leaving, not the other way around."_

_"But still, Kanon!" Our vocalist is having a hard time keeping his voice from breaking. "Teruki said he 'knew what he was doing' when he asked Takuya out, and 'knew what he was doing' when he broke it off with him. And you and I kept saying 'No, don't do it,' both of those times, don't you remember? This wasn't supposed to happen!" Miku can't find the energy to keep standing and flops back down on the floor, body hunched over and shaking. I scoot over to Miku, putting a hand on his tremoring back, but he shakes it off, not having it. "And n-now..." he sniffles, "Now, y-you like Takuya..."_

_...Wait, what did he just say?_

_I sit up, shocked. "What???" I exclaim, probably louder than I should because the remaining photoshoot staff is staring, though they have been since Miku started crying. "Miku-" "Don't pretend it isn't true," Miku looks up at me with tears clining to his cheeks, smudging his stage make-up a bit. "I can tell, Kanon, and I know you've liked him for a while, before he went out with Teruki. And I also know that he already knew you liked him."_

_....Wait, what did he just say?????????_

_"How on earth could you know things like this?" I ask, incredulous. He sniffles again. "'Ca-cause of my Mikusuke senses, I just know..." "...Seriously?" I look at him, and amidst the tears, he seems totally serious. "Well... It's also because I'm not distracted by a relationship or things like that the way the rest of you are. Same with Yuuki. But that's not the point," he rushes to change the subject. "Yuuki talked to you, right? Well, he talked to me, too. We sort of both put what we know together and... solved the puzzle."_

_" 'Solved the puzzle,' " I repeat, confused. "What do you mean by that?" Miku lets out a shaky sigh, sitting up. "You and Takuya were talking as Teruki was being shot. Teruki was done and talking to Yuuki. Takuya was called on-set, and that's when Ichiro came walking through the door. Takuya saw this and saw Teruki, too. And knowing your feelings toward him... well, I guess he figured you wouldn't mind, and he kissed you in front of Teruki and Ichiro." As he's explaining, he's using hand motions to 'place' each event in chronological order._

_You know that feeling when you think you're so right about something, you're positive you're right, and ignorantly defend your answer, only to be proven dead wrong? Well, that's how I feel right now. Miku's set-up is depressingly accurate, though I'm still wondering how I didn't know Ichiro was here, even before the kiss. "I..." Miku's right about another thing: The band's falling apart. I know Teruki doesn't want this to happen, but he's not doing much to help the situation, and neither is Takuya. And now me, Miku, and Yuuki are left in the crossfires, forced to pick sides. And I'm stuck, between one of my best friends, and a crush... he's still my crush, right? ...I'm not sure of that anymore, but still... "Maybe I should talk to Takuya... And you could talk to Teruki?" _

_Miku, to my surprise, shakes his head. "Yuuki's going to talk to Teruki, he volunteered himself. And I guess I'm the person that's going to get the info reported back to." Okay, that explains why Yuuki walked out with Teruki. "I just want to know what's going on, and that everything's okay." I nod, understanding. "But yeah, maybe you should talk to Takuya. I'm sure you have stuff of your own that you want to say to him, too."_

_There are his 'Mikusuke senses' again. I mutter a "Yeah" as I get up, and hold my hand out for Miku, which he takes as he gets up, too. "Kanon... if you and Takuya start dating- not now, but in the future- will things with you and him end up like Teruki's situation? If you break up, I mean. I'm not trying to say that the relationship will be doomed from the start, but-"_

_"Miku, what the hell are you even talking about?" I cut him off. He sounds like a 5-year old stuck in the midst of his parents' divorce, and is thinking so far ahead that it's making my head spin. "I don't even think Takuya likes me like that, so why does it matter?"_

_"I'm just saying..." Miku mutters, looking away. "Sorry, I shouldn't even assume things like that, I just... I don't know, I don't know much of anything anymore..." I can't stop looking at Miku in the fragile state he's in, it's like a car crash: tragic yet fascinating. I haven't seen him like this since... "It's alright. Look, just give me and Yuuki the night to talk to them, and then, like you said, we'll report everything back to you. Til then, just try not to worry, 'kay?" I put a hand on his shoulder, and unlike last time, he lets me leave it there, looking back up at me, still looking utterly depressed but nods, sniffling again. "Thanks, Kanon." I nod back. "Anytime. Anything to stop all this..."_

_Miku sacrifices his sad demeanor for a moment to give a small, hopeful smile, before turning away, grabbing his street shoes and walking out the door. I sigh as I change back into my street clothes, letting what I just promised to do sink in. And I feel my heart start to beat fast again, but it's because I'm scared. I don't know if I can really get the nerve to talk to Takuya..._

* * *

And here I am, back in my room again... when did I get here?

I guess it doesn't really matter. I can't think straight, I'm too tired in every sense of the word to function anyway. And on top of all of that, I'm still not sure what I'm supposed to be doing right now. I want to cry, but I can't... Oh dammit.

It's like when we have a live, and as soon as one song ends, the stage settings needed for the next song come in on-cue. It's just like this, because now, not only am I crying, but it's... vocal. I'm trying to quiet it with my pillow, and at this rate, I may as well just smother myself with it because I don't know how much longer I can go on feeling like this. I try to wipe the tears rolling down my face away, but more just keep coming in their place. It's frustrating, this and everything else.

I just... I can't do this anymore. I may as well type up a recognition letter to Red Cafe now.

* * *

I hear my cell phone vibrating next to me. It seems so loud, I just want to throw it across the room and keep sleeping...? I fell asleep? I didn't think I'd find this sort of peace, but I have to check the clock again since I don't believe myself, and it says 12:28AM. I look down and see the pillow I had over my face on the floor and covered with a couple of wet spots. I'm still sort of confused, but I just want the buzzing to stop. So I shake off my tiredness for the moment, and reach over to my nightstand to answer it, almost knocking over the lamp. "Yep?" I answer, still sounding half-asleep, and apparently half braindead because I don't check who is calling me.

Big mistake.

"...Kanon?"

I shoot up. That voice is what could, and did, wake me up completely. And not only the owner of the voice, but the tone of the voice as well. "Takuya? You sound terrible... What's wrong?" Why am I asking him this? In any case, _he_ should be asking _me_. _I_ feel terrible, too. God, _and_ I sound terrible.

"I..." His voice started off, wavering. "I-I don't really k-know... I'm really sorry to call you so late, b-but... I didn't know what else to d-do..."

I run a hand through my hair, worried for him now. Again, why? I still don't know, but even when he's hurt me so badly- if what Miku and Yuuki have told me is true, that is- I still just want to be there for him. ...Ugh, there must be something seriously wrong with me. "Don't worry about it. Did you want to talk? ...Or you can come over if you'd like." _'He can what?'_ I'm not sure why he'd said that, I'm not sure why I'm being like this at all, but aside from my own selfish reason of wanting to see Takuya, I do genuinely want to see him to try to help him ...Ohhh... _That_ was what I was supposed to do tonight, talk to Takuya. Oops.

"...Really? Y-you don't mind?" I hear Takuya sniffle, which only reassures me of my left-field suggestion.

"Of course not. Do you need me to come pick you up?"

"Umm... no, I can get there."

Alright, I'm not sure of much of anything, but I have a feeling that that answer sounded unsure. But I don't want to argue with him, so I'll just have to "buy it". "Okay, I'll see you soon, I guess."

I hear a click and look to see that Takuya's hung up without another word. I sigh, going from tired and down, to anxious and scared shitless all in one phone call.

* * *

**A/N:** How long has it been? ...Too long? Yeah, that's what I thought -.

Okay, so I've made some changes with this story. Here's a list:

1) I'm still fighting with the LJ formatting to keep my original formatting as it was...

Oh, _changes_... Okay, let me try that again...

1) Because it literally took me 7 tries to post it *right* on LiveJournal (and it still didn't work), I've decided to post all future chapters on Fanfiction dot net (here) until I can solve the problem I'm having. And I'll link the chapters to my LiveJournal account in the meantime ^_^

2) I tweaked the summary a bit when I realized that it wasn't a music video shoot where said-controversy happened, it was a photoshoot. So that's been changed, as well as Teruki's boyfriend, Ichiro, being a "mention". I didn't expect him to become a significant part of the story, but he is now, I guess.

3) I changed both the rating and the chapter length. I actually stole this from **silveryxdark**, where I'm doing "half chapters". This is chapter 3 (1). Chapter 3 (2) will be up... I'm not going to give a date, seeing as I can never get it in on the deadline I give myself XD But technically, this story is 4 chapters long, but since I've already said 3... well, it will be 3 hahaha. And it will now be PG-13 because of the language and super angst.

4) The format has obviously changed, because instead of a third person POV, it's in Kanon's view still. ...I don't know how that happened... But the next chapter will be both in Kanon's view and Takuya's view. Third person just doesn't work well for this type of story, you know?

5) I've said this before, but only the first part of the story is based on something that really happened in my life. The other chapters have the "essence" of it, but are not based on anything that ever actually happened. This is all to vent and my right to freedom of expression. I HAVE to make this disclaimer, because of fallouts and things changing and such... and I truly do apologize for any hurt of confusion I've caused with this story, it is not my intention and never was.

I doubt any of you read this, but oh well. I just wanted to make myself clear ^^ To prove I actually have some stuff with the final chapter done instead of leaving you all completely hanging, here's a preview:

* * *

_"I said... I'm sorry, Kanon. Really... really sorry." This is the first time he's looked at me since being in the doorway, and his eyes are shining and seem to be shaking a bit with uncertain tears. The sympathetic me asks, "For what?"_

_"For... you know. Back at the shoot..." Takuya doesn't want to say it, like it's taboo and a curse will fall on him if he says it. I shake my head, feeling disheartened myself that he's apologizing for it. That means he regrets it, and I do, too, but under different circumstances, I would have gladly accepted it. "It's fine, really. I know you're hurting-" Who is this crazy person? It sounds like me, but I suppose I'm just in denial. Yet again, I get cut off by Takuya._

_"Kanon, no, it's not fine! It's not..." Takuya now cuts himself off with his own sobs. He tries to quiet them, and I wish at that moment that I had the ability to suck the pain out of his heart, anything so he'll stop crying. I want to reach over and touch him, hug him, kiss him...? _

* * *

^_^


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